Markey Writes

– My Little Green Bike –

Last year I bought a bike. Nothing special, just an old bike that a friend was trying to get rid of. She gave me a good deal for it and it fit, so I said “hey, sounds good to me.”

Since I bought it towards the end of the Summer and due to the fact that I can be a bit lazy and unmotivated when it comes to exercise (and yes, I consider putting around the city on a little bike exercise), I actually only rode it twice. When the spring arrived this year, I was determined to get my money’s worth. I pulled that little bike out of the garage (i.e. dirt filled basement in our dingy apartment building), cleaned it up, filled up the tires with air and took it for a test run. Everything seemed to be working and in order.

My first run to work was tough. My bum hurt, my lungs hurt and I wasn’t used to all the amazing drivers on the roads. I also realized that the gears didn’t work and the breaks were a bit squeaky. Overall, it was a success.

Over the next couple of months I slowly built up my stamina on my sort of fixed-speed bike, and found a safe route to and from work. I was feeling, healthy and strong – sailing through the city without a care in the world.

Unfortunately, as with most things, the breaks slowly deteriorated. They became louder and louder, announcing my arrival at any street corner with an outrageous screech. Finally the day came when I realized that it was time to take it in to the shop – a dog barked in response to my screech.

When I took it into the bike shop, I asked to have the breaks fixed and also to get the gears fixed so I could use all three instead of just one (and I know what you’re thinking – yes, my little green gem had three whole gears!). The young gentleman who checked me in looked at the bike, back at me, back at the bike, back at me… and then said, I have to go and get another mechanic. He returned with another young lad who did exactly the same thing. Finally, we had three people looking at my bike in sheer fascination. I knew it was a special bike, I just knew it! I explained again to the third lad what I was hoping to have done and he started laughing. He replied “You couldn’t pay me to fix the bike.” What gall. What cheek.

He did go on to explain that as it was an old bike (I like to use ‘vintage’ – as in the older the vintage of wine, the better) and that the parts would be very expensive to get to replace the gear-shifter-thingy. “But, you can instead just ride it as a fixed-gear bike,” he said. “No matter,” I replied, “I can ride it as is as I am used to it by now, but can you please fix the breaks?”

A week later I got a call to pick up the bike. Finally, my little green friend was back in working order. When I went to pick it up, the total was significantly higher than what had been quoted – I had been told that to redo the brakes completely, the cost would be about $35 – but my total was closer to $70. Looking at the bike, I could see that the handles had been replaced – the older handles were the shifters for the gears that weren’t working. I asked about the increase in cost and was provided with an inventory of bike parts along with $20 for labour…. hmmmm, I thought – I guess I didn’t realize there was labour included?? I paid the expensive bill and headed home. As I got on my bike I realized that something had changed… my easy peddling had now turned into hard peddling… maybe a week without biking really did set me back that much? Darn this getting older stuff – not only are hangovers worse, but I fall out of shape in a week.

By the time I got home, I realized what had happened. When the young man had told me – “You can just ride it as a fixed-gear bike” he had actually meant “We can remove all the gears on the bike, remove the shifter handles and turn it into a fixed-gear bike on the most difficult gear.” I now have a bike with one, hard gear to get me around the city and all possibility of shifting to an easier gear has been removed. Silly me, why didn’t I understand what he meant. Maybe I can paint it a bright turquoise colour, get matching rims and thin wheels, wear fake glasses and high waisted short-shorts and blend in with all the cool kids. My masquerade is now over and I am cool because I have a fixed-bike. Thank you bike guys for knowing exactly what I wanted!

Conclusion: a harder gear means I go faster AND get a better workout. Lets keep our thoughts positive. 🙂